Subject: Introducing Yourself to Your Instructor
My name is Amit Vaidya. I am from India. I am in my first semester of senior year in Civil Engineering at Clemson University, SC. In this memo, I am going to tell you little bit about my background, interests, achievements and my goals.
I was born in a small village called Bilimora. Bilimora is located about 70 kilometers south of the city of Surat which is 8th largest city in India, in the state of Gujarat. I spent my first 16 years of life in Bilimora. Bilimora is famous for temples, textile mills.
My everyday activities included going to school, playing cricket, watching television, and going to temple at the night time.
I spend my first 16 year of life in Bilimora before moving here in Greenville, SC on August 23, 2002 with my family. I started going to South Side Highschool as a sophomore and was enrolled in ESL program for a year. At South Side, I focused on achieving my goals including learning English language, participating in extracurricular activities, and doing well in all my classes. In my junior year, I had joined Math club, Robotics club and also enrolled in few honor classes. Along with school, I also found a part time job at a local restaurant to help my parents financially. Moving in to a new country and settling there (here) was a huge challenge for me and my family.
I like playing Chess and Cricket. I
always enjoyed reading, writing and doing math. Growing up as a child and until now, (my adulthood) it has been mine (my) and my parents dream for me to become a Doctor or an Engineer.
----- I decided to become a Civil Engineer because I have always been fascinated by looking at the bridges, buildings, and skyscrapers.
------I decided to become a Civil Engineer because I am always fascinated by looking at the bridges, roads, and skyscrapers.
A degree in Civil Engineering enables me to achieve my goals and also gives me an opportunity to make a difference in the community.
I have achieved many different goals in life. Some of my achievements are bigger than the others, which has given me greater satisfaction. The top five achievements that gave me the greatest personal satisfaction includes:
1. Being student of the month in my English class
2. Getting my first job
3. Going to college
4. Learning English language
5. Getting my driver's license
My achievements have helped me to get ahead in life.
I hope to get better at technical communication this term. Five years from now, I want to become a project manager of a construction project, and technical communication is one of the most important skills that a project manager should have. As a project manager, my primary goals are managing people, set budgets, and making decisions of all kinds.
need help with editing and grammar
My name is Amit Vaidya. I am from India. I am in the first semester of my senior year studying Civil Engineering at Clemson University, SC. This sentence makes me a little dizzy with all of the prepositions. You might want to break in into two sentences . . . one telling what you are studying and the other where.I'd like to tell you a little bit about my background, interests, achievements you need a comma here to keep it consistent with the rest of your writing and my goals.
Bilimora is famous for temples,take out the comma and add the word "and" textile mills.
I started going to South Side Highschool high school should be two words) as a sophomore and was enrolled in put either "the" or "an" here ESL program for a year.
Moving in to a new country and was a huge challenge for me and my family.
I like playing Chess and Cricket you don't need to capitalize either chess or cricket. I enjoy reading, writing and doing math.
Growing up as a child and until now, (my adulthood) it has been mine (my) and my parents dream for me to become a Doctor or an Engineer. This sentence is awkward. You might want to reword it to something like: Since I was a child, my parents and I have shared the dream of my becoming a doctor or an engineer.
----- I decided to become a Civil Engineer because I have always been fascinated by bridges, buildings, and skyscrapers.
includes: Should be include
I'll give my ideas to help, along with Eric's ideas.
Here is an idea for this sentence: I spent my first 16 years of life in this city, which is famous for both its temples and its textile mills.
...watching television, and going to temple at night .
While growing up, and even now, it has been my and my parents' dream that I would become a Doctor or an Engineer.
Some of my achievements are bigger than the others, but they all have given me great satisfaction.
Very impressive!! Good luck. :)
first 16 years of my life I spent in
Actually, Quaker_75, "I spent my first 16 years of life" is correct. Your correction introduced an error. In English, the subject comes first in a statement, unless it is preceded by a subordinate clause or the object and subject have been deliberately reversed for a special effect. In this sentence, "I" is the subject, "spent," is the verb, and "first 16 years of my life" is the object.
Subject-Verb-Object is the standard structure.
If I were you, firstly I will think of which one aspect of yourself can mostly attract your Instructor.Then you can emphasize that aspect ,while others you don't need to spend lots of time.
Good luck :-)
Hey, this is my homepage, so I have to say something about myself. Sometimes it is hard to introduce yourself because you know yourself so well that you do not know where to start with. Let me give a try to see what kind of image you have about me through my self-description. I hope that my impression about myself and your impression about me are not so different. Here it goes.
I am a person who is positive about every aspect of life. There are many things I like to do, to see, and to experience. I like to read, I like to write; I like to think, I like to dream; I like to talk, I like to listen. I like to see the sunrise in the morning, I like to see the moonlight at night; I like to feel the music flowing on my face, I like to smell the wind coming from the ocean. I like to look at the clouds in the sky with a blank mind, I like to do thought experiment when I cannot sleep in the middle of the night. I like flowers in spring, rain in summer, leaves in autumn, and snow in winter. I like to sleep early, I like to get up late; I like to be alone, I like to be surrounded by people. I like country�s peace, I like metropolis� noise; I like the beautiful west lake in Hangzhou, I like the flat cornfield in Champaign. I like delicious food and comfortable shoes; I like good books and romantic movies. I like the land and the nature, I like people. And, I like to laugh.
I always wanted to be a great writer, like Victor Hugo who wrote "Les Miserable", or like Roman Roland who wrote "John Christopher". They have influenced millions of people through their books. I also wanted to be a great psychologist, like William James or Sigmund Freud, who could read people�s mind. Of course, I am nowhere close to these people, yet. I am just someone who does some teaching, some research, and some writing. But my dream is still alive.
This is a brief introduction of myself. If you are interested in knowing more, read my articles or take a look at my pictures. Do not expect too much, and keep your sense of humor.